


Whatever Happens, Happens

by nvrcominghome



Category: Bandom, Paramore
Genre: Band, F/M, Music, alternative
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:00:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27502696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nvrcominghome/pseuds/nvrcominghome
Summary: After being invited to a writer's celebration, the pair wonder how they will handle an evening together after tensions (and passions) have risen since Hayley's divorce. To make things worse, it also falls on Valentine's Day.
Relationships: Hayley Williams/Taylor York, Tayley - Relationship
Kudos: 11





	1. Oh to Spend

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Another transfer from my Wattpad account. However, with all the additional edits and corrections I'm making, I'd say these AO3 versions are far superior. If you've never read this fic anywhere, welcome! I'd love to hear feedback! Enjoy!

Taylor wouldn't define himself as lazy, but you couldn't pay him to check his mailbox in the morning. Especially in this time of year, when the brutal cold sank spirits and killed motivation. After shivering himself into consciousness, it was a chore to even get out of bed. Go _outside?_ Not unless a gun was pointed to his head.

However, it had been at least a week since he checked for mail. It was becoming irresponsible of him to continue ignoring it. Despite every cell in his body telling him not to, Taylor's mind forced himself to be mature. He trudged his feet down the stairs and onto his porch, his blue robe failing to make the freezing wind any less unbearable. The atmosphere of the neighborhood left much to be desired as well - the sky was a dull grey, his snow-covered street quiet and lifeless.

Predictibly from weeks of neglect, his mailbox was stuffed. Most of them were worthless offers or monotonous bills, all as colorless as the air around him.

The notable exception was a striking, sturdy envelope of a rich crimson color with the insignia of a bright golden sun printed on the back. Taylor immediately recognized it. The letter was from the Apollo Writer's Guild, a club of the most renowned writers of Davison County. Everything from authors, journalists, playwrights, lyricists, and composers. Getting a letter from them was a ceremony within itself. The letter itself was so beautiful that Taylor wouldn't dare shread the thick paper it as he opened it.

_"To Taylor York of Paramore,_

_We hope that this envelope finds you well, Mr. York. The Apollo Writer's Guild has been very impressed with your musical showings in Paramore for quite some time now to the point where this might seem overdue. You and your long-time songwriting parter, Ms. Hayley Williams, are invited to attend the Golden Sun Celebration at the Renaissance Hotel in Downtown Nashville on Feburary 14th, 2018. (Further details are available on our website.) As our honored guests, you will both recieve the award for Achievement in Musical Composition for 2017's acclaimed "After Laughter". Ms. Williams has also recieved a letter of invatation if you are not to find this. We hope to see you two attend as a pair, as we feel you both deserve recognition for your brilliant innovations within the alternative music genre. You make our little community of Nashville writers proud._

_Best regards, Rebecca Anderson (Department of Communications)"_

It was a true honor to recieve the letter, but Taylor couldn't care less about the invitation. Large crowds and prestigeous events weren't his thing, but there was an obvious upside to this particular event.

 _As a pair,_ his eyes lingered on those seemingly trivial words. Accolades were nice, but he was far more enchanted by images of him and the petite blonde out together, being recognized as one. He'd wear his best suit, take her for an evening drive through the town, dine and dance with her throughout the night.

Effectively speaking, he'd be taking Hayley out on a date. Suddenly standing outside didn't feel so frigid.

\---------

The evening had rapidly approached, its sudden onset leaving Taylor distressed as he prepared for a night with so much on the line. It was in these nervous moments where Taylor found himself most prone to daydreams and distraction. He had been gazing outside his bathroom window onto the street below for some time now. It had been a few months since he recieved the letter from the AWG. The air was still crisp, but there were signs of life beginning to emerge from under the snow. He noticed the setting sun at the end of the road casting his street in a warm orange tint.

Finally realizing he was off-task, his eyes returned to the mirror before him. Despite his modesty, Taylor had to admit that he looked pretty damn good. He bought the nicest suit he'd ever worn, the sleek blazer and bowtie almost as dark as his eyes. His hair was tapered short at the sides, but he allowed the curls at the top some extra length, not slicked down too harshly. He knew Hayley liked it that way. Likewise, he decided against shaving his stubble - Hayley always complimented him when he kept it.

 _Hayley._ It was annoying him how she influenced his every decision, but he couldn't help it. Taylor knew he wouldn't be able to keep up his neat appearance the whole night. He'd surely be a disheveled mess two hours in, but it meant everything to him that he made the perfect first impression on Hayley's doorstep.

His introspection was abruptly cut off when he caught a glance at his phone. 

**6:10.**

The event started at seven. He had been staring at both the street and his reflection far too long. One last approving glance at his mirror and he swiftly made his way to the black BMW parked in the driveway. He hurled himself in and sped down the road. His pace had rapidly increased since he first got ready - now he was close to running late.

Although he had fifty minutes to get to his best friend's house, he still had a pit stop to make.

Taylor figured it would be "gentlemanly" to bring his dear date a bouquet of flowers. He already thought the suit alone would charm her, but if he stood there with a romantic gift to offer, he was sure to make her swoon. Smiling at the thought, he pulled into the shopping plaza with the street-side florist's store and quickly scanned the selections.

He was a bit embarrassed that after all these years of knowing her, he had no idea what Hayley's favorite flowers were. Taylor guessed that wasn't a topic a girl would bring up if she wasn't expecting any from him.

His eyes settled on some red and yellow roses. _No girl dislikes roses,_ he assumed as he snatched the bouquet and approached the register inside. 

He was so frantic that he almost slammed the roses onto the counter, causing the man at the counter to wince. Taylor flashed an awkward smile in an attempt to lighten the mood. It seemed to have worked, the cashier making small talk while he handed Taylor his change.

"Some magnificent roses here. Very pretty. I'm sure they're for your equally pretty girlfriend?"

"Let's hope." Taylor joked as he rushed out the door.

His answer surely confused the florist, but he didn't have time to explain. Hell, Taylor could hardly explain the situation to himself with all the time in the world.

He was unsure of where things stood between them. Ever since she announced her divorce things have been...uncomfortable. Hayley's terrible ex had always been a wedge in the picture, always what was blocking them from becoming _more._

Or so he thought.

Once she left him or good, once Taylor was finally "free" to act upon his feelings, tensions weren't relieved but heightened. There was a palpable fear of the unknown. He never imagined he'd get that far, nevermind with someone who obviously needed time to heal. The museum tours or concert gigs they went to together all the time ceased immediately. Taylor was afriad they seemed like dates. In all fairness, they were to him.

But Hayley was no shot in the dark. He knew she felt something too. Times she'd rest her head on his shoulder or look into his eyes smiling for far too long. Times she'd say "I love you" a little too earnestly compared to how she told everyone else. Times where he swore she was about to kiss him but decided against it at the last second.

She sounded excited enough when he formally asked her to attend this with him, but he sensed the apprehension in her voice. It's as if he could hear her asking herself about what would happen if they spent an evening alone together.

At the final red light before Hayley's house, Taylor took out his phone to text her that he was close. Before he did, his stomach sank when he noticed the date.

February 14th. Valentine's Day.

Three months to prepare and he hadn't noticed the celebration was on fucking Valentine's Day?

Taylor was going to show up to Hayley's house in a bowtie with a bouquet of roses on _Valentine's Day?_ Could he be more imposing?

Panicking, he hastily pulled over just a few hundred feet from her house. He undid his bowtie, now embarrassed by it, and threw the roses in the backseat. He adjusted his collar and buttons so his tux didn't look completely ridiculous. He was there for music, right? They'd probably expect him to show up looking a mess.

Oh God, was it enough? Or was it too much that they were going to this together in the first place?

The pondering had to stop, though. He had arrived. Taylor parked in her driveway and after a deep breath, he walked to her door. Whatever Hayley's headspace was, he had no choice but to find out.


	2. A Night of The Apollo

If given the chance to do it again, Taylor would've probably gifted himself a spare moment outside before knocking on Hayley's door. His frantic gate left his collar crooked and his hair untidied. The morbid fear had barely vanished from his eyes when the singer opened the door.

He couldn't imagine the sight of him earning one-tenth of the reaction he got from the white door swinging open to reveal Hayley behind it. She wore a figure-hugging lilac dress made of a light, flowy material. Her long, almost white hair was partially tied up with two loose front pieces draped over her green eyes. The rest of her platinum locks flowed down the ivory skin of her neck and shoulders. She was a gorgeous throwback, one that left him speechless.

"Hey, T!" Her tone was cheery, her smile melting his heart. "Wow, you look amazing!"

Taylor worried that his ragged appearance would disappoint Hayley, but based on the loving expression on her face, it seems he's doing just fine. _Relief at last. Hopefully._

"Nothing compared to you." He chuckled back as Hayley ushered him inside and strolled into her kitchen. Taylor stayed behind in the doorway.

"Aww thanks. I tried going for something _ethereal_ with the colors, but a little punky with the hair. I think it suits me." She said casually, maybe she wanted to downplay their "date" as much as he did..

Regardless, he nodded in complete, absolute agreement. "I love it."

With them in separate rooms, an awkward pause fell upon the house. His nerves fired up again. _The fuck are you doing, man? Known the girl fifteen years and seven words is all you've got?_

"Sorry for being late. I was too busy checking myself out and I lost track of time." He cringed at himself.

His rare attempt at being ironically cocky was made even more laughable as Hayley was too far away to even hear it. Taylor's voice tended to soften as it becomes more anxious. Thus, to his embarrassment, the house was just as silent before his joke as it was after.

_God, can she please just come back?_

Thankfully, his prayers were answered as she returned to the living room with her purse, her flowing dress transforming her every step into a graceful waltz.

But she still wasn't talking to him, just going through her bag. Presumably checking if she had everything.

He needed to think of something to say. He thought of repeating his joke, but he second-guessed introducing attraction to the conversation. It would be a lot less awkward if the other person wasn't standing right in front of him. Plus, there was still the elephant in the room. The two were essentially going on a date on the most romantic day of the year.

Time was running out, though. The weight of the silence was becoming too heavy and he could feel his judgment slipping. _Just anything to keep the conversation away from Valentine's Day._

"Happy Valentine's Day."

_Fuck._

"Oh, it's Valentine's Day? I didn't even know." She laughed. "I guess that's how it is when you're single. It's nice, though, to not feel pressured or stressed about creating meaning in a meaningless holiday. I haven't been at it long, but single life is where it's at."

Taylor had no response to that.

"So anyway...we should probably get going, right?" She recovered. _Now that we're cutting tensions._ "Yeah, we're a bit late. I was too distracted by how sexy I looked to show up on time. My bad."

"Can't blame you." She said quietly, causing Taylor to blush. Once again, he felt a little bit of hope.

\------

The pressure wasn't on for them to make conversation during the drive. For both of them, evening drives were therapeutic times where they used the melodies of the music they loved to clear their minds and relieve the troubles of the day.

Usually.

Despite the gentle harmonies of American Football and the enchanting red and blue hues of the twilight sky, Taylor sat in the diver's wondering why he was still so nervous.

Things were going well so far, right? She said he looked good. And she dolled herself up too. Wouldn't that mean she wanted to impress him as well? Wait, was it wrong to assume that she made herself up for _him?_

 _What's there to worry about? She's my best friend._ He kept telling himself. Then, he glanced over only to see how the loose strands of platinum hair framed her full pink lips. Even in the dim lighting, her profile was perfection. _Oh right, my best friend is fucking beautiful._

The pair arrived at the Renaissance Hotel just as the sun had fully set. The extravagant building seemed like a skyscraper compared to the old shops and townhouses nearby. They pulled up to the valet and as Taylor got out of his car, one of the formally-dressed staff opened Hayley's door. That same person drove off and left the two dazzled by the golden light of the lobby shining through the giant glass doors.

"Since when were we in New York?", said Hayley.

"I guess we are at the Apollo, right?"

"Nice pun." She said flatly. "No it wasn't."

\-------

Hayley and Taylor walked across the shiny marbled floor towards the mahogany receptionist's desk to ask where the ballroom was. She directed them to a large, ornate hall with white-clothed tables, blazing red candles, and golden banners reading "Apollo Writer's Guild 2018".

The room was full of people, people who looked suspiciously business-oriented. The members of the crowd were all impeccably polished. Far from the colorful, sleep-deprived eccentrics you'd expected from a writer's event. 

"For an artist's guild, there's a lot of executives here. What the hell is the owner of the Autozone on 49th street doing here?". Taylor was the first to point out.

"I mean, someone's gotta pay for this ballroom I guess." They laughed. "You know...being an entrepreneur and all now" she put on a cartoonishly posh voice "means I know precisely who in this room is a blood-sucking money vampire who'll fuck over anyone for a quick buck."

"You sell hair dye for two years and you already think you can sniff out the reptiles."

"Baby, I was born exposing them." She scrunched her nose and put up her Devil's Horns.

He giggled. "Just find our table, please."

The two sat down and continued with their small-talk until they were introduced to the other people assigned to their table. Soon after, the event commenced.

Taylor didn't mean to be irreverent, but he completely tuned out from his surroundings. Hayley was preoccupied with the various speakers and recitals, so there went meaningful conversation. There was no open floor, so there went her wanting to dance with him. There went the chances for them to show how they felt naturally. Dancing was expected of them, an anticipated facet of the evening. Nobody had to step out of bounds and make things weird. It was the perfect window for a man too afraid to take direct action. But now that opportunity was gone. Taylor felt the rising hope he had felt earlier sink right back its place. 

To make matters even more uncomfortable, Taylor never had much of a poker face, either. Ever so private, Taylor was essentially exposing his disposition to anybody with a pair of functioning eyes. Anyone in the room could tell the guitarist was frustrated from a quick glance at his furrowed brows.

"What's wrong?" Hayley noticed his sour expression immediately.

"Nothing...it's just that this is a bit more boring than I expected."

"Really? I thought you'd already know this was gonna suck. Seeing how you never like these public events. Kind of shocked you even wanted to go in the first place." She admitted. 

Taylor felt a lump in his throat as he stared at her, not wanting to share why tonight was the exception to him. Hayley realized that in some way her words were hurtful. 

"Hey, I'm sorry, man. I know even if we both want this award, this is all really draining. It'll be over soon. Ours is coming up next, I think. You don't have to go up there to get it, if you want." She kindly assured him while rubbing his back, sliding her other hand into his. After a moment, she pulled away once the next speaker reached the podium onstage.

As his eyes glazed over the stagnant room with uninteresting characters, something briefly managed to catch his eye. A couple of tables to the right sat a stunning redhead in a black dress clad with gold jewelry and red lipstick, drawing Taylor's eyes in to her chest and lips. The girl, while beautiful, was not his usual type, but he did find himself staring longer than he probably should.

Just as Taylor caught himself and snapped back to reality, he could see Hayley smirking at him in the corner of his eye.

"Not so boring now, is it?"

Her teasing left his heartbeat increasing steadily.

"One pretty girl doesn't necessarily make this whole corporate snooze-fest worth it." he whispered defensively.

"It will if you go up and talk to her. I saw a flower stand in the lobby, go get her a bouquet or something after our award." Hayley suggested enthusiastically. "Maybe." he murmured in disappointment.

The homely man on the stage - probably the only man in the room who looked like they lived on a writer's wage - had transitioned from discussing lyricism in music to Hayley and Taylor's accomplishments. Anticipation built up in his stomach and the two were about to be called onstage.

"So, it is my greatest honor to award our Oustanding Accomplishment in Lyricism and Composition Award to Hayley Williams and Taylor York of Paramore."

The room roared with cheers and clapping as the pair made their way to the podium, her hands wrapped around Taylor's left arm. Not that he didn't appreciate the shiny gold statuette inscribed to him, but it seems that his life's passion was by far the least interesting aspect of the night. He quickly gave his general Thank You's alongside Hayley, who of course had the most insightful and captivating acceptance speech to give. It was one of the many gifts of hers he loved.

In the midst of mic feedback and blinding stage-lights, Taylor did make eye contact with the redhead directly in front of him. This didn't go unnoticed by Hayley, who momentarily paused mid-sentence, creating an uncomfortable beat between all three of them. Hayley quickly recovered and completed their speech and the two descended back to their tables with their awards. This time, however, her hands stayed firmly at her sides.

They both returned to their seats, but the energy had shifted drastically. Before it was Hayley who was providing warmth, charisma, and comfort to Taylor's disinterested persona. Now it was she who was cold and distant, concentrating hard on the napkin on the table before her while not saying a word to her bandmate. 

Taylor wanted to say something to investigate, but just as he opened his mouth to speak she interrupted him. "Hey, I don't feel very good. I think I'm gonna go. You don't need to drive me home, I'll just get an Uber." She quickly spit out. 

"Good luck with that girl." She added as a final measure with a big smile, one that was obviously forced.

Taylor was afraid of how it would look if he objected, he again didn't want to impose himself. "Okay."

After an empty side-hug, Hayley almost ran out of the room. He knew better than to follow her. _Knew better?_ He asked himself. _Or have I once again let things become worse?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The spell-check on this site is my best friend. Sorry Wattpad readers. The final chapter of this story should be up in a few days. Thanks to all who read!


	3. With Just You and Me

Hayley's Uber ride home was painfully numb. This was partially due to her mind not processing the implications of leaving Taylor on this special night, but it was mostly because she didn't want to let the thoughts flow and lose her composure in the back of a stranger's car. 

Instead of the vibrant, spirited reds and blues that painted the sky on her drive with Taylor, Hayley's above view was now nothing but an empty pitch black. It was silent as well, with none of the warm, comforting music he'd play for her. 

As she finally reached her house and gingerly closed the front door behind her, she felt her eyes tear up with regret. Why did she leave him there? Why did she always run when she felt her feelings gaining on her?

With her back against the inside of her door, Hayley thought back to one of the late nights when they were first writing their fifth album, the very one that granted them tonight's date. By then, Hayley had begun to assess the extent of the emotional damage that her ex had inflicted upon her. She often questioned everything about herself or how she could ever trust anyone again. While her mind would browse the catalogs of her relationships, she noticed she was always ashamed of them. Whether she was the other woman to a man almost ten years her senior or the bitter ex to her own guitarist, matters always ended up becoming a humiliating blow. Now, the embarrassment of falling for another bandmate while still married loomed over her every interaction with Taylor. 

But that almost didn't matter on that night two years ago. 

It was past one in the morning in Taylor's piano room. She texted her then-husband that Zac was there as well, not daring to admit she was at Taylor's house alone. The pair were exhausted from demoing eventual tracks for _After Laughter,_ tonight's being an early version of "Forgiveness". Though she was abashed to openly present such words of hurt and betrayal to him, she knew he was the only person in the world who wouldn't judge her for them. He wouldn't patronize her choices or pity her predicament, but simply work on the song as best he could while comforting her if she needed it. And damn did she need it. 

After reading the lyrics, Taylor's handsome face showed concern throughout the night. He could sense how uncharacteristically timid she had become in recent months, and tonight while recording he noticed a cry simmering under her voice. Eventually, she could no longer hold back and soft cries echoed against the mess of instruments and equipment surrounding them. 

"Hey, it's okay, Hayley." He stopped the recording and sat beside her. "We can do this another time if you want." He was always so sweet. They were sitting very close on the stool of his piano, angled slightly towards each other. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"It's just...this all hurts so much. Being with him, I feel like I'm suffocating." She sniffled out. 

Hayley didn't want to go into specifics with Taylor staring at her so intently. "I'm sorry, T. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I'm just so lucky that I have someone like you. Someone who always makes _me_ feel comfortable." She smiled weakly. "And Loved."

"Well, I do love you. You trusting me with your feelings is all I could ever want." He assured her gently. 

Love and wanting filled her eyes as if they were a clear projector of her thoughts. Taylor picked up on the signal and leaned in closer to her. Their faces were close to touching. She felt a sudden, overwhelming urge to kiss him. Not to lead to intimate contact but to substitute for words, which were lost on her right now. Planting one on him in earnest seemed easier. He seemed to agree, letting his eyes drop to her lips and resting his hand near her thigh. 

That was too much for her. 

"Taylor, I...really need to get some sleep. I should probably go now. Goodnight." She was so swift heading out the door that Taylor barely had time to say it back before it slammed shut. 

And so began the pattern. 

\------

The heater in Hayley's antiquated home was failing miserably as she sat on her couch absolutely freezing. Alf was sleeping soundly on his bed in by the fireplace, he must've been so warm. She wished Taylor was there to warm her up, if not by touching her but by simply being so radiant that he distracts her from the cold. 

But no, she had to run away. 

And to make things worse, she subtly set Taylor up with that girl. Why on earth did she do that? Even if it stung like a viper's bite to see Taylor looking at the redhead, she thought he wouldn't go for it when she suggested he talk to her. But when she caught them eying each other, her heart sank at the prospect of their attraction being mutual. It started a panic within her, the idea that he preferred someone else. Not that he would, but that he could. Her body treated this conjecture as fact and it told her to flee. 

But why should she care who Taylor's attracted to? Why does the image of him and the redhead inflict lashes upon her heart. Ones of betrayal. Hayley's feelings of ownership confused her. _He's not mine._ If Hayley were honest with herself for just a moment, she would confess that she had seen Taylor as hers for a long time now. And herself as Taylor's. 

She would never admit to him the agony that those images bring her. She couldn't stick around to show contempt or jealousy, exposing her desires and putting their friendship on the line. Friend or lover, Taylor meant the world to her. Hayley could never risk losing the lifeline she had in him.

_No,_ she thought, _I'm not in love with Taylor._

Her mind wrestled with collages of Taylor and the redhead cut together with fantasies of Hayley being his Valentine, them dancing in an empty ballroom while gazing into each other's eyes. Her heart yearned inside her chest. 

On the outside, she sat silently on her couch forcing herself not to cry. Crying would make the feelings real.

\------

Her sulking was brought to an abrupt end when she heard a knock on her door. 

It wasn't until then that she realized that she hadn't showered, changed clothes, or fixed her hair and makeup. She did not look her best, but she opened the door anyway. It seemed she had nothing to more lose if the random person outside saw her like this. 

But there on her doorstep stood Taylor. With a warm smile on his face and a bouquet of roses in his hand. His appearance was a marriage between his trademark scruff and classic glamour. His hair had become a little messier since she last saw him, but he was now wearing a bowtie.

"Happy Valentine's Day." 

Her heart melted at the endearing sight before her. "Taylor, what's all this?" She knew exactly what this was. It both excited and terrified her. 

"Well, you said to snag yourself a Valentine with a bouquet." he said modestly as he gestured the slightly wilted red and yellow flowers towards her. She took them into her hands. "Thank you so much, T. They're beautiful. "

He followed her inside to place the flowers in the vase on the coffee table. She couldn't stop smiling, which Taylor noticed. He was watching her every move, Hayley felt his eyes scanning her body. It was as if he was anticipating a sudden move, afraid of her saying or doing something drastic. Once she had set the flowers in their place, he approached her in the kitchen. 

His hands trembled slightly as he took a deep breath mere inches away from her. 

"Let's put some music on. I wanted to dance with you back at the Apollo."

She could tell he wasn't completely confident in his actions, but she was so taken by how handsome he looked and how gorgeous those flowers that he had already swept her off her feet. 

"I'd love to." Hayley could barely contain their smile. 

While Taylor went to plug his phone into her stereo, Hayley retreated towards the corner of the living room and took in the view. She admired the concentrated look, amused at how focused he'd get for a task as insignificant as selecting a Spotify playlist. He decided to go with his "Indie Feels" playlist (she made fun of him for the name all the time, even if she made it with him). The gentle hymns filled the room and he made his way to Hayley, who was leaning against the wall as if it were homecoming in a high school gym. 

He held out his hand for her with the most innocent of smiles on his face. She graciously took it as he led her to the center of the room between the couch and coffee table. There wasn't much space for movement, but that didn't matter for what Taylor had in mind. 

"Can I pull you closer?"

She inhaled sharply when he wrapped his hands around her waist and brought his chest to hers. She instinctively brought her arms around his neck. Hayley looked into Taylor's searing dark eyes and smiled. As the slow melodies of Big Thief began to pick up, the two swayed together in rhythm. She brought her head against his chest while he rested his chin on top, bringing her in even closer. 

Ever since he was invited to the Apollo's event, Taylor was under the impression that the mere setting of dim lighting, elegant garments, and sentimental spirits would be enough for things to unfold naturally. He thought they'd be dancing and then falling right into each other. Not until now did he realize he still needed to make the final play once all the cards fell into place.

"I need to talk to you, Hayley."

She looked up to him. "About how you should've been wearing that bowtie the whole time?" 

"No." Taylor chuckled. "But I'm glad you like it." He paused. "You know I've wanted to do this for a long time, right?"

"What about that girl?" Hayley blushed, knowing fully that she was irrelevant to the conversation they were about to have. But the hidden, insecure part of herself embedded deeply within still needed that confirmation. 

"After you left I didn't see her again. I have a feeling you didn't want me to either." She was avoiding eye contact. 

"I know she wasn't your type, I was trying to make the night fun for you." She lied. "I know you don't like going to those things."

"Do you know why I wanted to go in the first place?" Hayley shook her head, although she was already piecing together the answer. 

"I hate crowds and don't give a damn about awards, but in complete honesty, I haven't been that excited for a night since our first AL show. The idea of us spending an evening alone together all dressed up, after all the weirdness and circumventing of these past few months, is what gave me hope that this could go somewhere. That's what I want right now. No more dodging, no more running, just you and me."

Taylor could tell he came on a little strong as Hayley's eyes went wide and she let her arms down from his neck. A little apprehensive, he continued. 

"I got you those flowers on my drive here, and I _was_ supposed to wear this bowtie the whole time. I wanted to impress you so badly, but then I got frightened that you didn't feel the same way or that I was being too obvious...so I backpedaled. That's something we both seem to do."

She took a step back. Her anxious responses caused his own levels of dread to rise. 

"I love you, Hayley." He finally admitted, partially out of desperation. "I don't want any other girl, I never have. I'm completely in love with you. I want to be with you." 

Hayley was completely stunned. 

"Taylor...I've just broken out after being trapped for ten years, I just want to feel free for a while." The blockades were still in place. Her heart was pounding and her lips quivering as she found any reason she could to keep herself safe. 

"Who says being with me is trapping you?"

He was right. Taylor was everything her past partners weren't. He was gentle, empathetic, insightful and, most importantly, someone who actually loved her for who she was. He never tried to shape her as if she wasn't good enough as is. Being with Taylor meant she never had to change the way she dressed or the music she listened to. The way she thought about the world or chose to carry herself. Nothing. She could just be herself as they traveled the world playing the wonderful music they wrote together. Being with Taylor was being free. 

"It's not." She admitted. "I dream about us being together all the time. Those dreams bring me such happiness, T. But the same thing pulls me back to reality every time. I don't want to risk losing you and what we have. You're my best friend." She began to tear up again, he took her hand to comfort her. She continued, "I wanted to preserve was I thought was safe, but now I see that our friendship has been different for a long time now. It's been so strained and hurtful to lie suspended in this avoidant, aching state, but I'm still scared of the outcome."

"I'm afraid too, but I can't deny this anymore. I know after you left him you needed time to heal, and I know that you still have a long way to go. But the way you look at me, the things you say to me, the reaction you give to the mere implication of me being interested in another woman - you feel something, Hayley. We both do. This is what we have now, and it's up to us to make something of it. It hurts too much to ignore. All love is a risk, but there's only one thing that matters to keep us safe." He assured her and looked right into her eyes, "Do you love me too?"

"Yes." 

He stepped closer to her and cupped her face in his hands. 

"Taylor..."

"All we can do now is just see what happens."

He slowly but firmly brought his lips to hers, pulling her into the most loving of kisses.

The ecstasy hit both of them like a train. _Finally,_ they both thought. 

Hayley wondered if the kiss that would've been those two years ago would've felt like this. _Would it have felt right at that time? Would it have been this slow and sweet? This calm and gentle?_ She then told herself to get her head out of the past, as her incredibly sexy bandmate began kissing her with more vigor and passion as his hands ran up and down her body. 

Hayley pulled away from him for a second. "By the way," Breathless, she giggled. "You never asked me, but yes, I'll be your Valentine." 

The cheeky tone of her remark was emulated by Taylor, whose eyes were already heated with lust. "I wonder how I could show you my gratitude..." He flashed a devilish smile before bringing her chin up and kissing her again. 

She leaped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. Her arms were tied around his neck, ensuring that there wasn't a millimeter of space between them. He hoisted her up by her thighs and hitched up her lilac dress before taking her upstairs. The trip to her bedroom was uneven and directionless, almost as if Taylor was too distracted by the feeling of her body against his to walk properly. But it didn't matter, they were in no rush. 

\-----

The morning of February 15th was another bitter winter ordeal. The sun had yet to come out, casting the sky in a bleak grey overcast. Frost covered the windows of Hayley's bedroom while the air cooled the walls inside. The discarded pieces of clothing on the floor were frigid to the touch.

The same could not be said about Hayley and Taylor, who kept each other cozy underneath the comforter. Their bodies were entwined together as they had been for the past nine hours, the memories of last night's affairs keeping them hot. 

They could both sense that the other was awake, yet said nothing to each other. There was no need to. They simply laid quietly in a tangled mess of limbs with grins on their faces and warm sensations in their chests. Neither of them were cold, neither of them would ever be again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's all folks! Thank you to everyone for reading (or re-reading) this story! I hope that the edits, though minor, improved the reading experience. As for what's next, right now I need to focus on my finals, so I wouldn't count on "Never Felt This Sensation" being uploaded on here for another couple of weeks. Hoping to have everything on here by early December.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope to have all three chapters uploaded and edited this week. Thanks for reading!


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